If I never see Megan Markle in the news again it'll be too soon

The Brits think we're trash

If they want to come handle things again, I'm into it.

NBA sends out roughly 200 cease-and-desist orders to unsanctioned All-Star parties in Atlanta
by u/FBI_Agent_82 Knicks in r/nba 4 minutes ago

It's Atlanta....

I’d shag me.
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/dankmemes 28 minutes ago
master of the wind
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/funny 32 minutes ago

Smart move by the van. Airbender get the right of way.

It’s about to go down.

It was said you'd bring balance to the force, not leave it in barkness!

uhmm, elmo? are you alright bud?
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/funny 39 minutes ago

Looks like the Sesame Street Slasher is back. I'm going to come get this evidence.

It’s about to go down.

It's over Doodlekin, I have the high ground.

The incorrect quotes generator got surprisingly accurate
by u/FBI_Agent_82 Slytherin in r/harrypotter 10 hours ago
Doge drift

This was the second time I've ever watched NASCAR and I kind of get it now.

My mood right about now.
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/funny 12 hours ago

Hell yeah! Glad your brain gave you the good chemical.

Forbidden Lemon Glue budder 76.2%
by u/FBI_Agent_82 heavily Medicated in r/FLMedicalTrees 12 hours ago

You just blew my mind, FLG is one of my favorite strains and I didn't know this existed.

I believe in a higher power.
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/funny 12 hours ago

So high I thought you spelled kidding with a b

Couldn’t go out to celebrate my birthday during lockdown, so I threw a party for myself.
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/pics 13 hours ago

My favorite is the one in the mask, judging everyone else.

A true peacemaker
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/trashy 13 hours ago

"If anyone is gonna fuck my daughter tonight, it's gonna be me."

-This Guy(probably)

#DOGECAR Let’s go baby much VROOM !!!!

It's the law.

My lord is that legal?
by u/FBI_Agent_82 Meesa Darth Jar Jar in r/PrequelMemes 13 hours ago

How do you get upvotes in seq.... Don't.

Just kidding we all know it's The Mandalorian.

Post nut clarity

Dude it's the internet.... They're both furry porn.

Vaccinated U.S. Travelers Could Start Entering Hawaii Without Restrictions in May

Worst case scenario have them watch Home Alone 1 & 2 religiously until they are trained well enough to be left behind.

Upon returning, have a neighbor go into your house first. You may need multiple neighbors to clear the whole house of traps.

Using "big words" is not pretentious

Leviathan-esque

You pretentious bastard. /s

subway is over-hated

I just looked it up and the nearest Quiznos to me is 43 miles away. I'd rather go on an 86 mile round trip to Quiznos than walk across the street and go to Subway. Luckily I live in Florida and I have Publix Subs.

Found this lost gem in a very old part of my photos. (Not sure if its fake or not)
by u/FBI_Agent_82 in r/funny 14 hours ago

I'd pay him to sit in the back of a comedy club on open mic night. Floridaman can't always be chaos.

Got the yocan uni pro and it's great.
by u/FBI_Agent_82 heavily Medicated in r/FLMedicalTrees 14 hours ago

Not to mention 3v burns the hell out of your throat.

pls help

Fun fact, this is the time when you toss the candy on the conveyor belt.

Please, I beg you
by u/FBI_Agent_82 Meesa Darth Jar Jar in r/PrequelMemes 15 hours ago

I'll try penis, that's a good move.

[Stein] NBA commissioner Adam Silver on the recent push led by Kyrie Irving to change the league's logo: "There are no ongoing discussions right now at the league office"
by u/FBI_Agent_82 Knicks in r/nba 15 hours ago

If they made a new logo this season it would be of a ref blowing a whistle.